Links · Legacy archive
Humorous Links
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PONG LOL!!
#41Got a grudge? Hire a hitman!
http://hitman.us/images/title.gif
Permanent Solutions to Common Problems!
Additional services (offered at a modest markup):
* crime scene alterations
* corpse removal
* cremation services
* eyewitness elimination -
PONG LOL!!
#42http://www.totalillusions.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=321&hl=
Watch out, those hackers are dangerous types. What a story. -
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#43See the Wacky Warning Labels at http://www.mlaw.org/wwl/
A few older contest winners:
A label on a baby stroller warns: “Remove child before folding
A brass fishing lure with a three-pronged hook on the end warns: “Harmful if swallowed
A household iron warns users: “Never iron clothes while they are being worn�
A label on a hair dryer reads, “Never use hair dryer while sleeping�
A warning on an electric drill made for carpenters cautions: “This product not intended for use as a dental drill.�
The label on a bottle of drain cleaner warns: “If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product.�
A smoke detector warns: “Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire.�
A massage chair warns: “DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving.�
A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, “Do not drive with sunshield in place�
An “Aim-n-Flame� fireplace lighter cautions, “Do not use near fire, flame or sparks�
A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use “while sleeping or unconscious�
A 12-inch rack for storing compact disks warns: “Do not use as a ladder.�
A cartridge for a laser printer warns, “Do not eat toner�
A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: “Not intended for highway use�
A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: “May irritate eyes�
A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: “Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.�
A snowblower warns: “Do not use snowthrower on roof.�
A dishwasher carries this warning: “Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher.�
A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: “Caution - Risk of Fire�
A box of birthday cake candles says: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.�
There are also quite a few _surprising_ lawsuits on the page... enjoy them. -
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#44Not meant as a joke in any way, but still an entertaining piece of trivia:
Men do have trouble hearing women, scientists find
"The findings may help explain why people suffering hallucinations usually hear male voices, the report added, as the brain may find it much harder to conjure up a false female voice accurately than a false male voice."
Anyone ever wondered why is God most often considered a man? :) -
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#45Courtesy of Kinslayer:
http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=287
and follow-up
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/33440
http://explodingdog.com/ -
PONG LOL!!
#46In A.D. 2101
War was beginning.
Captain: What happen ?
Mechanic: Somebody set up us the bomb.
Operator: We get signal.
Captain: What !
Operator: Main screen turn on.
Captain: It's You !!
Cats: How are you gentlemen !!
Cats: All your base are belong to us.
Cats: You are on the way to destruction.
Captain: What you say !!
Cats: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Cats: HA HA HA HA ....
Captain: Take off every 'zig' !!
Captain: You know what you doing.
Captain: Move 'zig'.
Captain: For great justice.
http://www.planettribes.com/allyourbase/index.shtml -
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#47(Ads on site might not be appropriate for work viewing...)
Now, this is what I expect our RP characters could do.
http://www.drunkendelight.com/view.php?id=1908
Can this be real? In homage to the threads title.
http://www.drunkendelight.com/view.php?id=1828
( http://www.drunkendelight.com/videos.php - index) -
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#48Stereotypical Gamers to the Extreme!
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7521044027821122670
(11 min video, long download for slow modems but very funny!) -
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#49Heeeey! Who put our previous session on tape!? -
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#50
Stereotypical Gamers to the Extreme!
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7521044027821122670
(11 min video, long download for slow modems but very funny!)
I think I've met those guys at conventions... Now I'm worried in case anyone I know sees this then starts looking at me funny. -
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#52http://www.nostalgiacentral.com/features/20moviethings.htm
Despite the name of the link, these are 40 things that happen only in movies. Enjoy those cliches.
---
And:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=49IDp76kjPw
The real life Simpsons intro. Neat for a fan of the Simpsons. -
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#53http://monkeydoo.com/onlineflash_thering2.php
Seen the ring? This shows a flash show of The Ring video, then a few seconds letter you get a phonecall like in the ring saying you will die in 7 days if you don't do ________________ whatever was typed.
Lots of other pranks on the site. Not sure about the registration thing since my wife only did the one thing on me. Funny though! -
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#54http://www.ultimateshowdown.org/
Pay attention to the lyrics and this might be mighty fun, if you have seen your share of movies and know your "history" :D -
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#55I'm not a Chuck Norris fan, but this is hilarious.
www.chucknorrisfacts.com
It's a crazy long list of "facts."
Example:
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
and
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is. -
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#56whoops, put this in the wrong spot -
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#57This is serious! I know you are all computer addicts, but sometimes even that gets too far.
Watch out, if you notice one of the top ten signs of tech obsession:
http://www.theage.com.au/news/technology/signs-of-tech-obsession/2006/07/05/1151779009040.html -
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#58Couple fun geek appreciate videos
http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/geek-phone-sex-p1.php
--From SNL
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/124324/star_trek_cribs_directors_cut/
--Star Trek Fun
-
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#59http://www.bbspot.com/News/2003/09/rpg_life.html
After being bribed with an old P233 Gateway system, the 26-year-old Systems Programmer was convinced to leave his apartment in order to demonstrate his RPG-As-Real-Life system.
"Okay," Davis explained, "the goal here is to gain experience so you can level up - just like an RPG. For example, I haven't had a date since about the time that Skies of Arcadia: Legends came out. So my objective is to talk to girls without being paralyzed by overwhelming social anxiety."
He continued, "Every time I talk to a girl, I reward myself with some experience points. The longer the conversation, the more experience I get. Instead of playing as a character in a game, I am the character and my social life is the game. In the end, I am able to transform an unknown, frightening reality into a comfortable, exciting fantasy. Remember - reality: bad, fantasy: good."
Davis then made his way to a nearby bus stop where an aged homeless woman wearing Hefty bags on her feet was slouched against a fire hydrant.
"Now THIS is more like it!" Davis exclaimed enthusiastically.
He proceeded to have an animated discussion with the transient. After several minutes of conversation, Davis presented her with $1.58 in loose change and reported on his progress.
"I'd say I only get 5 EXP for that encounter," Davis said with some disappointment. "She was a very low-level creature. Still, every little bit contributes to that next level." He then logged the five experience points into his PDA.
It is worth reading the rest of the article, but HAHAHAHAHA. -
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#60"So my objective is to talk to girls without being paralyzed by overwhelming social anxiety."
YAY! :lol: -
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#61Holy Rusted Metal, Batman! G-villes just a 40 minute drive from me. Heh. Wonder where he gets his stuff. -
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#62ROTFL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQXpGpa1BSY
Roleplayers meet real life. -
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#63Larp
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEaE3xT317o
The Giant and the Beholder. -
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#64I think I may have posted this before.
Worth a repeat.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=liG5AvPiqqk
"Vampires aren't even evil....Football players are." -
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#65Got sucked into youtube tonight. Too much going on around me to do much else.
Ultimate Utopia XXIII http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNzFE8rNPQU a little silly but long
BOOM, HEAD SHOT http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tc2NOqE-uc
Menace on the Borderlands http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEVMd4UkM5M Give it a minute, it gets funny
One More: Attack of the DMs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXbb1O_RNAA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTrZmpkRQs4&NR
Tom et ses chums! Farador D&D (Part:1) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhmUj9QJ9RM
Tom et ses chums! Farador D&D (Part:2) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9FMURHhgzc ((only the French :D ) -
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#66Is this us?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzuVdY1oURs -
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#67copy and paste the following code into your address bar (copy over the address)
javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI=document.getElementsByTagName("img"); DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i-DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=(Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5)+"px"; DIS.top=(Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5)+"px"}R++}setInterval('A()',5); void(0); -
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#68Nice one, Strolen. I thought it did nothing, but then I scrolled up and noticed what it does! -
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#69WOW!!!!!!!!!! -
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#70AHHH!!! RUN AWAY!!! -
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#71IT'S A POLTERGEIST! SOMEONE CALL THE GHOSTBUSTERS!! -
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#72Instructional tutorial on Posting.
http://home.comcast.net/~benbrausen/Funny/Posting.swf -
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#73Recently one of my friends, a computer wizard, paid me a visit. As we were talking I mentioned that I had recently installed
WindowsXP on my PC. I told him how happy I was with this operating system and showed him the Windows XP CD. To my surprise he
threw it into my microwave oven and turned it on.
I gave a cry and groped for the tongs, because the CD had become precious to me, but he said: 'Do not worry; it is unharmed.'
After a few minutes he took the CD out, gave it to me and said: 'Take a close look at it.'
I received the CD in my shrinking palm: It seemed to have become thicker and heavier than ever. At first I could not see
anything, but on the inner edge of the central hole I saw an inscription, an inscription finer than anything I had ever seen
before. The inscription shone piercingly bright, and yet remote, as if out of a great depth:
"12413AEB2ED4FA5E6F7 D78E78BEDE820945092OF 923A40EElOE5IOCC98D44 AA08E324"
"I cannot read the fiery letters," I said in a quavering voice.
'No,' he said, 'but I can. The letters are Hex, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Microsoft, which I shall not utter here. But this in the Common Tongue is what is said, close enough:
'One OS to rule them all, one OS to to find them, 'One OS to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.' -
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#74It doesn't work, all it does is leave the cd stuck to the microwave tray in a burning, stinking mess similar to how the OS runs in real life. -
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#75Subject: Home depot scam
A "heads up" for those of you who may be regular Home Depot customers.
Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.
Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic.
Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you.
Here's how the scam works:
Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over to your car as you
are packing your shopping into the trunk.
They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their
breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to
look.
When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say "No" and instead ask you
for a ride to another Home Depot or Lowe's.
You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having intimate relations
with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and
performs oral on you, while the other one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen November 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th,
20th,& 24th.
Also December 1st, 3rd, twice on the 7th, three times just yesterday and
very likely again this upcoming weekend.
So be careful! -
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#76I'm with HIM! -
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#77The B.O.O.K.
Announcing the new Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge device (BOOK). The
BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: No wires, no electric
circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so
easy to use, even a child can operate it. Just lift its cover! Compact and
portable, it can be used anywhere--even sitting in an armchair by the
fire--yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM
disc. Here's how it works...
TECHNICAL OVERVIEW
Each BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper
(recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information.
These pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder
which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence.
Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of
the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs in half.
Experts are divided on the prospects for further increases in information
density; for now, BOOKs with more information simply use more pages. This
makes them thicker and harder to carry, and has drawn some criticism from
the mobile computing crowd.
INPUT/OUTPUT
Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information directly into
your brain. A flick of the finger takes you to the next sheet. The BOOK
may be taken up at any time and used by merely opening it. The BOOK never
crashes and never needs rebooting, though like other display devices it
can become unusable if dropped overboard. The "browse" feature allows you
to move instantly to any sheet, and move forward or backward as you wish.
Many come with an "index" feature, which pinpoints the exact location of
any selected information for instant retrieval.
ADDITIONAL FEATURES
An optional "BOOKmark" accessory allows you to open the BOOK to the exact
place you left it in a previous session--even if the BOOK has been closed.
BOOKmarks fit universal design standards; thus, a single BOOKmark can be
used in BOOKs by various manufacturers. Conversely, numerous bookmarkers
can be used in a single BOOK, if the user wants to store numerous views at
once. The number is limited only by the number of pages in the BOOK.
You can also make personal notes next to BOOK text entries with an
optional programming tool, the Portable Erasable Nib Cryptic
Intercommunication Language Stylus (PENCILS).
Portable, durable, and affordable, the BOOK is being hailed as the
entertainment wave of the future. The BOOK's appeal seems so certain, that
thousands of content creators have committed to the platform. Look for a -
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#78Okay, now this is a serious challenge:
http://www.shutdownday.org/
It is obvious that people would find life extremely difficult without computers, maybe even impossible. If they disappeared for just one day, would we be able to cope?
Be a part of one of the biggest global experiments ever to take place on the internet. The idea behind the experiment is to find out how many people can go without a computer for one whole day, and what will happen if we all participate!
Shutdown your computer on this day and find out! Can you survive for 24 hours without your computer?
On March 24 will start the experiment. I am not so sure about myself... what about you others? -
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#79What are they? Psycho?? -
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#80wait... shut off your computer... and not turn it back on for a whole day? you can do that?