Requesting advice

"He travels the seas looking for what cant be found. To his love his heart is still bound"

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-Before Death-
Many years ago there was a young sailor name Vener Cred. He was only 16 when he joined a crew of a merchant ship. He spent 10 years at sea. But there was seemed to be only one thing that scared him. Death. He had no god, no religion, and no hope of an afterlife.

His mind drifted from this, though, when he met a young girl on land named Sarah Berkback. Needless to say they fell in love. He spent about 20 years on land living with his new lover.

This love was only a distraction though, from the inevitable. He was in his 40's and his thoughts began to trail back to death. "He talked to his friends and wife about what they thought of death. Tell one day he was approached by a man.

The man spoke "I have heard what your fear and know what you desire" he held out a small black orb with a button on it "if you press this button you will live forever, but it will come at a cost, if you press it I will be back" the man walked off before he could say any thing and seemed to disappear into the crowd on the busy street. When he got home he did not tell his love about the event. He hid the orb.

He spent several years thinking about the orb. He knew he wanted to press the button, but he couldn't live forever with out Sarah. He thought about this until one day it was decided for him.

Sarah was robbed and killed in a dark ally. He realized he had only one thing to do. He went to the old stump where he hid it took it out. Slowly he moved his finger toward the button. With a final push he pressed the button. A needle came Jutting out of the orb and pierced his hand.

He dropped the orb in pain, which dissolved into dust. He felt more pain then he had ever felt in his life. It felt like he was being sucked into him self. Finally he passed out.

He awoke in the same place he has passed out. He felt... different. His mouth was dry. As he moved his tongue around his mouth felt that he had grown a small pair of fangs. He crawled to a nearby pond. And looked into it. He saw nothing, not even he own reflection.
After Death Part 1: First Meal
Well the local towns folk did not like the idea of a vampire living in the town and promptly ran him out of town. He wondered for a bit, He was hungry but any food he ate he could not hold down, it was not vampire food. Had sudden craving for something. He needed something red. He needed blood!

He looked around in a frenzy trying to find someone he could suck the life out of. Tell he found what he was looking for. He ran into a young married couple, the man was willed darkmoon. But his attention was fixed on the women, Melian Cresant. She was young blond girl, slightly shorter then average wearing a yellow dress.

They where young and oh so oblivious. Vener traveled with them for a bit, like a beast stalking its pray, savoring for the taste of blood. Until one day the chance came.
The group was sitting around the campfire the girl about to Dose off next to her lover. There was a rustle in the bushes. Willan sat up and drew his sword. "I'm going to go check it out, he said. And he ran off into the darkness. This was Vener's chance.

Melian was fast passed out laying back on her backback with her head tilted just enough to show her neck. He crawled over to her quietly. And He slowly oh so slowly embraced her neck wit his mount slowly sinking his teeth in. he felt wetness on his tongue. Blood! He drank and drank enjoying the meal he had waited so long for he had gotten his fill when he heard the sound of footsteps. He paniced, having no weapon to defend himself from the coming rage.
So he ran he ran as fast as he could he could faintly hear a yell of rage.

He got far enough away when he sat down and started to cry. What had he done? He was no better then the tugs that killed his own love.

"So I see you have had you first meal," Said a dark familiar voice, I told you I would be back
-To be continued... Again-

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6 comments

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  1. Dozus

    So far, it seems like an eccentric retelling of a classic vampire. I like the personal aspects, but I'm more interested in the "To be continued" part. Why should I be more interested in Cred than the average "Undead with wanderlust searching for a lost love" story? What makes him stand out? I think this has great potential, and I'd love to see what you can accomplish with him, Cloud.

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  2. Misanpilgrim

    The "to be continued" part should include:

    1. Who the mystery man is, and why he's handing out Vampirizers.

    2. What Van is going to do with his new undead-ness. The love of his life is dead, he's as close to immortality as it's possible for a human to get... now what?

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  3. cloudncali

    Updated: Updated: Sorry about the delay on the update. I had a writers block.

    After death part 2 coming soon(hopefully).

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  4. Mourngrymn

    This seems more like an NPC write up to me,not an article on character gaming. Unless I missed something. Articles are usually used to help others with learning something about gaming, whether it is how to best role-play, create gaming ideas, stories, scenarios, adventures, campaigns, etc. An article is a helpful tool for players and GM's to use. Hope this helps.

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  5. Aramax

    Lose the button,it makes it too techno for me,keep on plugging!

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  6. valadaar

    Article,Fiction would be a better assignment for this one.

    The vampirizer in the box is an interesting idea though.

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