101 Useless or Trivial Super/Mutant Powers!

#1

This is a fun idea I was kicking around with a friend. I wanted to make it a full 101 before releasing it to the main site, but ran dry at 80. Please help me finish!

As a superhero or mutant, you have gained the power to:
[list type=decimal]
Run twice as fast when naked
Make any candle burn with the power of two lumens
Know the full ancestry and family history of a person you don't know
Know whether a plane will crash after it has taken off
Change your ears to any shape imaginable
Teleport – but only to work
Time travel – but only to next Monday.
Accurately predict the score of any amateur mini-golf match
Predict the last three finishers of any horse race
Make anything taste like garlic
Gain control over one atom at a time
Change the message in anyone's fortune cookie
Change wine to water
Change silver to lead and gold to tungsten
Become completely nonbouyant
Increase or decrease the temperature of a room by 5 degrees
Make one other person believe that they have super powers
Instantly identify the source of any smell
Sweat Gatorade
Instantly gain as much weight as you like (you still have to work it off)
Make yourself invisible to one person at a time
Talk to pigeons
Hear what dogs are saying, but be unable to speak back
Turn any carpet to shag
Grow a tail (it has to be cut off)
Get a song stuck in someone else's head
Make anyone say an inappropriate word by pointing at them
Locking eyes with someone for a few seconds will cause them to urinate uncontrollably
Change anyone's keyboard layout to DVORAK
Make anyone .5 inches taller or shorter, but only when concentrating on that person
Give anyone an ice-cream headache
Excrete a pheromone that makes you utterly repulsive to members of the opposite gender
Speak puns in any language
Always know the location of the nearest public restroom
Emit a weak radioactive field
Bend all your joints backwards
Observe someone else's dreams
Use your saliva as a weak glue
Rearrange your facial features
Re-size any clothing to fit you perfectly
Make anything smell like wet dog
Slightly increase the effect of gravity around you
Make yourself test positive for any drug
Perfectly imitate the sounds from a modem, car alarm and microwave
Know your enemy's biggest personality flaw
Make any stain permanent
Infuse water with the scent of pineapple
The ability to predict the results of any game played on a Tuesday
Attract lighting strikes
Increase someone's blood alcohol content through kissing
Forget the past hour of your life at will
Always land on your feet
Instantly turn milk to yogurt
Make your own hands super slippery
Know the middle name of anyone you encounter
Decrease the denomination of any bill by touching it
Run as quickly backwards as you can forwards
Make any liquid instantly become room temperature
Make a sound that will attract every cat within a half mile radius
Force all your body hair – including that on your head – to fall off at once
Drink salt water safely
Always remember if you're forgetting something
Always know where true North is
Predict to the minute the next rainfall
Always look like the wind is blowing through your hair, even indoors
Change the color of your urine
Transform into a minnow
Know if someone is watching you
Remember anything you read, but only for a day
Sprout daisies under your feet as you walk
Piss weak beer
Teleport one inch in any direction
Flap your arms so fast you can hover for up to five seconds
Set your own hair on fire
Shed your skin like a snake
Slow time down, but only for yourself
Jump twice as high as a normal person
Grow feathers in place of hair
Predict any coin flip, as long as you've touched the coin first
Create a two square foot spot of shade