[DELETED] The Master's Blade of Sheboygan

1. [DELETED] The Master's Blade of Sheboygan

   #1

   The Master's Blade of Sheboygan | Type: Large_Sword | Author: Finger Master
   
   Only the misteerous Master can weld the Blade of Sheyboygon.
   
   
   When the Master fondu the the Blade in the Caves of Wildness he slayed himself five orcs. Each one gave the sword a +1 bonus so now its a +4 great-basterd claymore sword. It also hass the flaming bones sepcial abilitie. Now will any brave orc come fourth to clain the blade? See my other posts for further vackbround,
   | | Hits 11 | Added 08.22.05 23:24 | Votes 1 Rating 1.00
   
   Comments
   
   CaptainPenguin Submitted: 08.23.05 01:16 [ 1/5 ]
   
   Isn't Sheboygan a town in New Jersey or something?
   Points subtracted for:
   -D&D jargon and no real explanation of abilities
   -Poor grammar
   -Only 5 sentences long
   -"When the Mastr fondu the the Blade in the Caves of Wildness he slayed himself five orcs". That is possibly the funniest sentence ever written by a human being.
   
   1/5.
   
   Scrasamax Submitted: 08.23.05 09:46 [ 1/5 ]
   
   So it is a Great bastard claymore sword. I would imagine this to be a sentient claymore with a really crass attitude, like if someone hammered Andrew Dice Clay into a sword, since a bastard sword and a claymore are two different types of blade. I have a hard time reconciling a hand-and-a-half and a two-handed sword, unless somehow it is a two-and-a-half handed sword...
   
   The Sword gains +1 for every orc it slays, what an uber-munchkin idea, like gaining a character level for every monster you slay, even if it is the lowlyest kobold. Sigh.
   
   So the Grandmaster of Melted Cheese (its the same thing here in the states, Taxus ;) found a sword of power in Jersey, and thence commited multiple counts of murder by killing several orcs with it. I hate to tell you this but it seems that Mr. Cheese will be found guilty of Hate crimes against Orcish-Americans.
   
   Spelling - sucked, but I'll give you a point for the imaginative Vackbround.
   
   Content - My commentary is longer than the item.
   
   I'm going to go slay myself some orcs.
   
   Taxus Submitted: 08.23.05 10:01
   
   Master Fondu? There's a word in Finnish where fondu(e) means melted cheese. I don't know, it's possibly the same everywhere else. But still.
   
   "see my other posts for further vackbround". Weeell... You couldn't link them here for our convenience could you?
   
   See my other comments on your item's for more information.
   
   Barbarian Horde Submitted: 08.23.05 10:46
   
   The same general comments apply to this item as apply to your Finger. This one is more on the right track. It seems to focus more on the item, its origin, and even some of its powers rather than a raw description of abilities and a flimsy backstory (well, flimsiER).
   
   MoonHunter Submitted: 08.24.05 10:00 [ 1/5 ]
   
   Just when you think the posts could not get any worse.
   
   It terms of langauge,spelling, and punctuation, it is poor. I have a hard time reading it. And you mispell things awfully! We should reject this post just on these grounds.
   (When you are done with your post, copy and paste it into a word processor, run spell and grammar check, then copy and paste it back, then post it. Just so we don't reject it right out of hand.
   
   
   In terms of conception: It is so bizzare that without explanation it makes no sense.
   
   In terms of effort: It is dashed off. It shows little or no respect for the reader or themselves. This drek is a waste of memory space and should be deleted asap.
   
   It is too short to be useful. There is no organization, no attempt to explain. It is the shorthand version from a BAD DM's notes. The author needs to take a look at what goes into a highly rated post so they can see what we expect in a post.
   http://www.strolen.com/items/index.php?order=rating&dir=DESC

2. [DELETED] The Master's Blade of Sheboygan

   #2

   
   -"When the Mastr fondu the the Blade in the Caves of Wildness he slayed himself five orcs". That is possibly the funniest sentence ever written by a human being.
   

   
   
   I could only agree.

3. Re: [DELETED] The Master's Blade of Sheboygan

   #3

   There is no way that this was a serious submission.
   NO WAY.

4. Re: [DELETED] The Master's Blade of Sheboygan

   #4

   Thanks, Captain, you've made my day with reminding me of this.  :lol:
   
   
   What a treasure trove we have set aside! I think I planned at some point to pick the 'Worst of the Worst'... but then realized I had not the time or strong enough will to read them all over again. Nice reminder.

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